The Nelson Bay couple were given the diagnosis in 2011, but thought things would get better.

For four years Mr Whitlam, who turned 90 on August 15, cared for Eileen, who will turn 90 on October 31, until things became so bad he had to move her to Regis The Gardens at Corlette.

“Even when she went in the nursing home I thought I’d be able to bring her home,” Mr Whitlam said. 

“But I know I can’t. She does come home for a few hours. I play her music and give her some biscuits. She knows she’s home and asks why she can’t stay.”

More than 353,800 Australians currently have dementia. According to Alzheimer’s Australia, this number is projected to reach more than half a million by 2030. 

Simplistically, dementia is a brain disorder that affects thinking, behaviour and the ability to perform everyday tasks. Dementia can happen to anybody, but the risk increases with age.

Alzheimer’s Australia is encouraging people to learn more about the disorder during Dementia Awareness Month in September, so those living with the condition feel less isolated and alone.

Mr Whitlam visits Eileen at Regis every day. He said his wife recognises him, and asks why she has to live there. 

But when he asks Eileen if she has seen their daughter, Gina Owens, who works at Regis, she often cannot remember.

“I think if I didn’t go every day she wouldn’t know who I am,” Mr Whitlam said. “I think one day she just won’t recognise who I am.”

It is a “terrible” situation, Mr Whitlam said, when the person you have shared most of your life with does not remember the early days.

The Whitlams married in England on December 9, 1950. They met while picking fruit at farms around the country as part of a post-war working holiday scheme.

The pair, with their four young children, immigrated to Australia in 1961. They moved to the Bay in 1983 to be closer to Ms Owens.

To celebrate Mr Whitlam’s 90^th birthday, Eileen joined him and their family at Nelson Bay Bowling Club for lunch on August 14.